Nodding Her Head Means Something Specific – Just Maybe Not What Salespeople Think it Means
While listening during a conversation, head nods are an automatic mannerism for women. When she nods, that means, “I get it. Keep talking.” Some salespeople confuse nodding and occasional “mmhm” murmurs as agreement or a readiness to close the deal. So, they’re confused when they get to the end of a pitch full of head-nodding, go for the close and get this response: “Oh, no, I’m not ready to buy. I need to think about it.” (And her statement doesn’t mean NO, by the way!)
Selling to Women? When She Stops Nodding, You Stop Talking
When your women customers stop nodding, that’s a very conscious communication. It means that she has something to say and would like space in the conversation to say it.
In male gender culture, when you have something to say, you jump in and say it. Interruptions are okay– and even respected. In female gender culture, that behavior is a social faux pas. You’re supposed to listen and wait your turn.
Here’s an quotation from some of my research with women customers interacting with salesmen:
“He wouldn’t stop talking! He just kept going! I did everything I could think of to indicate I had something to say. I closed my notebook. I put my pen on top of it. I arranged all my papers on my desk. Nothing worked!”
This customer was sending her salesperson all the polite, non-verbal signals she knew to indicate it was her turn to talk. But, since she never interrupted him, he had no idea these signals were meaningful.
Salespeople, remember that female gender culture has its own set of rules and etiquette. And pay attention to her non-verbal cues. They mean more than you think!
This is soooo interesting and really makes so much sense when you think about it! Women are intuitive and truly expect that you will get their non-verbal cues. We need to “watch” what they are saying if we expect to earn their trust and make a sale. Great post!
My wife is ALWAYS lecturing me on this stuff for our customer service in our tow business . Of course me, being male, I always blabber on and on and forget to listen. Our customer base is mostly women because men don’t like to call a towing company unless they absolutely need it, whereas women are more inclined to pick up the phone and call for help. I just need to get better at learning to listen and read body language. We’ll see if that ever happens haha!
Nice job on your website! Quick thought: if most of your customers are women, it wouldn’t hurt to put a picture of you/your employees somewhere on the home page. Women feel very vulnerable when they are stranded, and knowing whom to expect to show up is very reassuring!
Thanks Marti, that’s great advice!
Thank you for your advice Marti, I will definitely need it as most of my customers are women 🙂
I’m wondering if matters much anymore… more and more women are in leadership positions and own businesses. I even know a woman who owns a towing business who is the owner. One might assume that it would be a man that would.
You might be right – but I think the genders are getting closer and closer together.
Are your thoughts still the same as when you wrote this?
-Luke
Thank you for sharing this! I’m going to have to think about how to incorporate this into my business, being traditionally a more male-dominant industry.
-Tony, owner of Columbus Concrete Installation
Hey, Tony – Super-easy: Just stay aware, and if she starts out nodding while you’re speaking, watch for when she stops. At that point say “Does that sound right to you?” or “Is that what you had in mind?” or something to that effect. Then wait a beat or two to give her time to form her response. Don’t just jump right back in and re-explain.
This helped us a lot since most of our clients for our rug cleaning business are single moms who have to work multiple jobs.
Very interesting observation!
Thanks for sharing!
Glad to be able to help!
Thanks for the info! Concrete Contractors Charlotte, NC
As a man i must say this a a very interesting read and actually learned a lot. Not sure how I ended up here but thank you for sharing!
Great article. Fun to read
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Thank you for this post. Found it very informative.
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